Sheer And Utter Chaos
Sunday headbutt.
First things first: bring on the fantasy baseball championship!
And let's get this out of the way: the odds of this actually happening are mind-boggling.
Let's talk names and numbers for awhile. You meet someone, hopefully you find out what their name is. Let's assume, for the sake of my argument so that I will be right, that most all people have 3 words to their name: first, middle, and last.
There are a lot of name combinations that could make up those three words. You have a million or so names for your first name, we'll say 100,000 or so for a middle name, and maybe 500,000 or so for a last name. So the odds of two people have the exact same first, middle, and last name are quite low. The odds of those two people spelling their names exactly the same, instead of a Steven-Stephen situation, is even lower.
So what the hell are the odds that I would meet someone this weekend that has the exact same name (first middle last and spelling too) as someone that I was already friends with? I'll tell you what they are, absolutely freaking ridiculous, that's what. But it actually happened.
So what does this mean? Are the stars aligned in some way that this is a sign that I must interpret? Should I immediately start playing the lottery? Maybe this is someone's way of telling me I should let the TV dwarf out for some much needed exposure to sunlight. Or maybe it means that my ideas won't keep getting stolen by that 4'8" guy at night. As great as those ideas are, they aren't the right answer. But I have figured out the true answer.
It means that I am immortal.
But it also means that these people can never meet. They must be kept apart for all time, never to get within 3.7 miles of each other. I fear what would happen to the world if they did. I can't imagine the chaos that their combined auras would produce. It's almost unfathomable.
At least I got that immortal thing going.
K bye.
First things first: bring on the fantasy baseball championship!
And let's get this out of the way: the odds of this actually happening are mind-boggling.
Let's talk names and numbers for awhile. You meet someone, hopefully you find out what their name is. Let's assume, for the sake of my argument so that I will be right, that most all people have 3 words to their name: first, middle, and last.
There are a lot of name combinations that could make up those three words. You have a million or so names for your first name, we'll say 100,000 or so for a middle name, and maybe 500,000 or so for a last name. So the odds of two people have the exact same first, middle, and last name are quite low. The odds of those two people spelling their names exactly the same, instead of a Steven-Stephen situation, is even lower.
So what the hell are the odds that I would meet someone this weekend that has the exact same name (first middle last and spelling too) as someone that I was already friends with? I'll tell you what they are, absolutely freaking ridiculous, that's what. But it actually happened.
So what does this mean? Are the stars aligned in some way that this is a sign that I must interpret? Should I immediately start playing the lottery? Maybe this is someone's way of telling me I should let the TV dwarf out for some much needed exposure to sunlight. Or maybe it means that my ideas won't keep getting stolen by that 4'8" guy at night. As great as those ideas are, they aren't the right answer. But I have figured out the true answer.
It means that I am immortal.
But it also means that these people can never meet. They must be kept apart for all time, never to get within 3.7 miles of each other. I fear what would happen to the world if they did. I can't imagine the chaos that their combined auras would produce. It's almost unfathomable.
At least I got that immortal thing going.
K bye.
posted by Rich @ 11:48 AM
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